I chose to get up from bed late as a principle to not eating early but this guy will not let my plan be my plan… okay, you too analyse this yourself
I was kuku resting in bed after surviving a deep and horrible death called sleep… just to get hold of life before forging ahead to my normal way of life which obviously involve little house chores and washing and adoring my body with one of the best fragrance and a beautiful cloth to behold.
This broda that sha wannabe now called somebori as early as 9 o’clock then guess what he said
“Baby, as if I was born yesterday shior. ..how was your night but as I tried to recall or frame a story which I didn’t partake in as I was far gone in sleep; he jump the gun without comparing the lost of life… anyway, life only matter to those that matter. (Laugh)
“Baby, have you eaten”? Aww! How sweet can you be if not like this but trust me, I have never dread any UI question like I dread this question in my life
Wait o, shebi he should let me find my voice abi? iro o, he kept doing the talking and I had to pinch myself to be sure I was back in the land of living.
Kilo sele gangan sef. (Hiss) can I just own the floor abi nah phone floor… okay, I finally get hold of the right word
I’m still in bed but really, I don’t know what to eat… really, in his baritone voice… yes, really! Okay baby, I’ve eaten delicious rice and stew… oh! Is that suppose to make me feel better?
I quickly added, where’s my portion…then again this time he didn’t just jump the gun but he shot himself in the head… hmm! You’re far away from me so there’s no way I can feed you my rice…
Radaada in jenifa’s voice… why will you feed me shey I’m handicap ni? Anyway, as I was saying, he shot himself by saying he will send me money to eat… Aww! How else can I start my day if not this way with a “gift of money”
Broda didn’t know I was brokelin and the money part got me seated in bed immediately… wait o, all you bad belle don’t think I will jump up for the money, who wouldn’t in this frustrating and often pushing for suicidal economy… If I hear that I leave a kobo Uncollected.
Now the sad part is that for over three weeks of this promise broda wannabe rich has refused to send the money but he’ll always called to reassure me… insult upon injury
Dear readers can you just tell me what to do to this dude because his reassuring call is becoming annoying… oya wait hear this part
He said I should come and visit him then he’ll give me transport OMG! If I don’t have transport, how will I get to his place in the first place? I yaff suffered in this broda pepperdemdown parole.
Anyway, I’ve resulted to be a gem by ignoring his call and also become an advocate for #keepthechangebruh
Abi war idat sef… wat is strong in all this brodas.
Kindly drop your comments, advice and also share my experience to a friend.